We’ve all done it, gotten our words fractured and said the wrong thing. English clergyman William Archibald Spooner became so famous for his accidental tongue twists with unintentional comic effect, we now call them Spoonerisms.
Thanks to fun-with-words.com, the column on the left shows what his hearers heard, often in sermons, and the column on the right shows what the reverend intended to say. After reading these, I’d be a blithering idiot, if I knew how to blither. Now please share the worst word tangle you never hoped to say—and have a great week!
For more blog posts and news updates, check my website, delorestopliff.com
fighting a liar | lighting a fire |
you hissed my mystery lecture | you missed my history lecture |
cattle ships and bruisers | battle ships and cruisers |
nosey little cook | cosy little nook |
a blushing crow | a crushing blow |
tons of soil | sons of toil |
our queer old Dean | our dear old Queen |
we’ll have the hags flung out | we’ll have the flags hung out |
you’ve tasted two worms | you’ve wasted two terms |
our shoving leopard | our loving shepherd |
a half-warmed fish | a half-formed wish |
is the bean dizzy? | is the Dean busy? |
know your blows | blow your nose |
go and shake a tower | go and take a shower |
tease my ears | ease my tears |
nicking your pose | picking your nose |
you have very mad banners | you have very bad manners |
lack of pies | pack of lies |
it’s roaring with pain | it’s pouring with rain |
sealing the hick | healing the sick |
go help me sod | so help me God |
pit nicking | nit picking |
bowel feast | foul beast |
I’m a damp stealer | I’m a stamp dealer |
hypodemic nurdle | hypodermic needle |
wave the sails | save the whales |
chipping the flannel on TV | flipping the channel on TV |
mad bunny | bad money |
I’m shout of the hour | I’m out of the shower |
lead of spite | speed of light |
this is the pun fart | this is the fun part |
I hit my bunny phone | I hit my funny bone |
flutter by | butterfly |
bedding wells | wedding bells |
I must mend the sail | I must send the mail |
cop porn | popcorn |
it crawls through the fax | it falls through the cracks |
my zips are lipped | my lips are zipped |
bat flattery | flat battery |
would you like a nasal hut? | would you like a hazel nut? |
puke on | coupon |
belly jeans | jelly beans |
eye ball | bye all |
fight in your race | right in your face |
ready as a stock | steady as a rock |
no tails | toe nails |
hiss and lear | listen here |
soul of ballad | bowl of salad |
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