May the Bard be with you!

To complete my last blog theme, it was perfect that my publisher, Scrivenings Press, held their first annual authors’ writing retreat April 15-18 in Hannibal, Missouri. That’s my normal stopover place on my snowbird journey north, exactly halfway back to Minnesota from  Mississippi.

Hannibal, of course, is Mark Twain’s home town. When I was a doctoral student at the University of Missouri, I took my two young sons to see Mark Twain’s home and Tom Sawyer’s fence, etc., in Hannibal. I thought I had seen the place.

Wrong. I’m impressed with the marvelous exhibits and recreations of Mark Twain’s world the good people of Hannibal have added since then. There is so much more to see and do. Afterward, I phoned both sons and suggested they visit again.

During the authors’ retreat, we also had a lot of fun. My prize for winning a complicated word game was a product I didn’t know existed—a can of Shakespeare Insult Bandages. These are not ordinary Band-aids to slap on cuts or sprained toes. These are high-quality adhesives for wounds requiring above-average cultural care. The 15 plasters (bandages) inside the handsome can are decorated with an image of Shakespeare plus insulting quotes from the Bard’s plays.

It might be worth getting wounded to display such treasure, but I’m actually being careful so I won’t need to use them.

Here are several insulting selections, “Do thou amend thy face, and I’ll amend my life.” “Thy wit’s as thick as Tewksbury mustard.” “Thy breath stinks with eating toasted cheese.” Who wouldn’t want to limp proudly bearing such words?

Culture and inspiration come in all forms these days. Which  Shakespearean quote would you like to wear over a wound?

What wise or memorable words from any other author would you like to have plastered on yourself for rapid healing?

Meanwhile, may the wondrous colors and sweet scents of May flowers surround and delight you!